Map of global flight paths by Brandon Jackson (no relation).
Last week I attended a friend’s 50th birthday party – a beautiful gathering that was as much a celebration of community and of all the guests as it was a celebration of the friend whose birthday it was. With pizza, ice cream tacos, and a private concert by the incredible duo Ryanhood (highly recommended!), there was a lot of fun, laughter, and great conversations. In the midst of some of those conversations, I was struck by how the gathering was a snapshot of a group in motion: in the handful I spoke with, a number of people had flown in (or back) within the past 24 hours (from Japan, Germany, Arizona, two separate UK trips, and maybe more that I’m forgetting). Within the 24 hours following the party, many were flying out for work or other reasons (back to Arizona in two cases, to Taiwan in two others, and again, more that I’m forgetting). Quite apart from the physical travel, people at the party were also in the midst of many life changes and transitions in other ways: starting a new job, grieving loss and traveling for a funeral, celebrating a contract renewal, navigating divorce, celebrating graduation, looking for work, becoming fluent in a second language… In short, a lot of life was happening.
On the back of a program I had facilitated that morning with college students who had flown in from around the country and around the world to work on Summer research programs – one on brain cancers, one on technology to help drones not crash into each other, one on voting patterns in Brazil, among dozens of others – I was taken aback by the rich tapestry of life experiences (both past and present) in these groups; a different form of unique diversity and diverse unity. Maybe that’s the case in any group.
In both of these cases, our gatherings were an intersection – all our paths came together from different places (physical or metaphorical), and we met briefly for our time together, before our paths diverged again. And it seems there’s research to suggest that this is part of the reason why these kinds of experiences – from worship services to stadium concerts, protests to weddings – matter to people.
In a later article we’ll look at what Priya Parker’s book The Art of Gathering: How We Meet and Why it Matters has to offer on the topics of creating intentional and meaningful experiences in our gatherings, but for now, let’s consider a first step of simply noticing and appreciating the intersection in which we sit in any meeting or gathering.
This Week’s Tip:
Enter gatherings and meetings with a mindset of curiosity about the global intersection you are entering into: Where are people coming from (physically or metaphorically)? Where are the going next? This doesn’t mean you have to quiz everybody or ask anyone to divulge anything they don’t want to say, but keep a curious mind to pay attention to what people say about where they’re coming from, and where they’re going next. Doing so may open a few doors for us:
- It helps us to stay in a mindset of curiosity, and to notice and appreciate others’ experiences and situations;
- It reminds us to be present to the current moment and the group we are with;
- It can bring forward a sense of gratitude for the gathering, and for the people who are there with you.
Try this out this week, and let us know how it goes! We’d love to hear from you.
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Building Bridges Leadership 